Are You A Chameleon?

A chameleon is a type of lizard that is known for changing its skin color to match its surroundings, but it’s also a behavior commonly displayed by people-pleasing humans.

A person that chameleons, is someone that is constantly adjusting and adapting themselves to “fit” into their current environment. 

This often looks like their thoughts, feelings, and beliefs change based on who they are having a conversation with.

They are always reading the energy of the people they interact with and using that to determine how to act.

Chameleons often blend in so well, that they forget who they actually are on the inside. 

If you’re someone that has been in the habit of being a chameleon for most of your life, you might not even be sure who you actually are anymore.

You might struggle to come up with your own opinion without getting input from others first. It might be hard to make your own decisions because you’ve learned not to trust yourself. 

Somewhere along the way, you became so effective at hiding your real self from others, that now your real self is hidden from you as well.

Chameleons often find social gatherings absolutely exhausting. 

In groups of people, chameleons are always trying to guess what the “right” thing is to say and show up as the version of themselves that they think others expect them to be.

They might dread the idea of going to a large social get together because they know by the end of it that they’ll be mentally exhausted.

Social gatherings are a lot of mental work for chameleons because now they have multiple people’s reactions to try and predict instead of just one person’s. 

In social settings, the chameleon’s brain overloads.

It’s easy for chameleons to become overstimulated in social environments because now there are more unpredictable factors present (i.e., more people).

If someone asks them a question, they have to think through their answer twice as hard because they have to figure out an answer that will be acceptable to everyone there.

They spend a lot of mental energy trying to figure out the answer that will make everyone happy.

Sometimes chameleons might freeze in these types of situations because their brain gets overloaded trying to predict every person’s response. 

No wonder social situations are exhausting for them!

Being a chameleon, makes it hard to be mindfully present. 

Chameleons are always trying to predict how someone is going to respond to what they say before they even say it.

Their brain is trying to fast forward and predict the entire flow of the conversation, which makes it hard to be present in each moment and actually hear what is being said to them.

They can often find themselves doing mental gymnastics. “If I say A, they’ll say B, and then I can say C, but if I say B, they’ll probably say C, and then I’ll have to say D.” They’re not just anticipating the very next thing being said, but they’re trying to predict the flow of the entire conversation before it even happens!

How Therapy Can Help.

Treatment for Women can help you explore what part of you causes you to show up as a chameleon and explore who you actually are on the inside. It can help you figure out how you really think and feel about things. It can help you learn to trust yourself and gain confidence in showing up in the world as your real self. If you have questions about therapy for women or would like to book a session with me, please use the Contact Me button below.